12-11-2014, 02:14 PM
#1
  • kav
  • Banned
  • east of the sun,west of the moon
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I woke up this morning @ 5 A.M. I started the dishwasher, brewed tea and then went back to sleep until my alarm went
off @ 6A.M. only Pyewacket started biting my arm and I heard
a sound like a ship's boiler exploding.
I get up, no water. Maintenance arrives @ 8A.M. and shut the whole system down. An EMPTY unit broke a pipe and flooded.
No problem; I go to get my earthquake supply from the closet.
It's gone. My nephew 'borrowed' it for a roadtrip and my mom forgot to tell me.
I try to drain off what remains in the pipes. It comes out rust coloured. So I remember the icecube trays in the freezer.
My mom uses ice often and puts empty trays back in. NO ICE.
Now Pyewacket is looking at his waterbowl, me, the waterbowl and parades with a disgusted air into his carrier and paws the door closed.
There's 6 bottles of red wine in my closet, white balsamic vinegar and a can of pineapple in syrup.
I'll walk over to the swimming pool drink machine. $1 for an 8oz water- a ripoff at half the price. My stash of change is gone and I notice so is my raincoat. It's trying real hard to rain outside and NORCAL is flooding. I'm pondering fratricide when my nephew shows up.
I want to SHAVE.Sbathroom_grooming_shaving_100-100

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 12-11-2014, 04:16 PM
#2
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Sorry to hear about the busted water pipes. Always good to keep bottled water around. Take it from someone who has lived in the hurricane belt for many years.

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 12-11-2014, 06:00 PM
#3
  • kav
  • Banned
  • east of the sun,west of the moon
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Water came back on @ an hour ago. I had to run into the bathroom and turn it off once all the air had bled out.
In haste I left my laptop on. Pyewacket left his carrier
and SAT on the keyboard.
The little fiend left the audio disabled, my type size somewhere between invisible and 15% and a new toolbar vertical VS horizontal. My EBAY account is now in Canadian
dollars.
I sorted that all out and shaved.

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 12-11-2014, 06:10 PM
#4
  • freddy
  • Banned
  • San Diego, California, U.S.A.
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Chris, you lead a most fascinating life. Biggrin

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 12-11-2014, 06:54 PM
#5
  • kav
  • Banned
  • east of the sun,west of the moon
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He's stretched on the floor asleep; mewing in some dream like one of the painted animals of Lascaux or Altamira.
those animals were painted in Animal fat that remained fresh until bacteria from human visitors began degrading them.
*makes mental note not to inhale my scented tallow soaps so much*
Pope Francis just declared that animals do in fact go to heaven too.
Some research group mapped the domesticated cat's genome and found only 2 mutations from wild cats. They announced cats must have started hanging around ancient graineries killing mice and the two represent 'friendlier cats more inclined to keep company with people IF FED; But are fully capable of interbreeding and returning to feral populations unlike dogs,
and therefor only semi-domesticated'.
And to think, I couldn't get a grant to test my graduate hypothesis. I only needed a reinforced Norwegian trawler and fuel for 6 months.

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 12-11-2014, 11:01 PM
#6
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Hmmm, what painted the animal fat paintings? Humans without bacteria?

Sorry. Continue.

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 12-11-2014, 11:22 PM
#7
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A good rant is a tension reliever. You should feel better now Biggrin

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 12-12-2014, 09:21 AM
#8
  • kav
  • Banned
  • east of the sun,west of the moon
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Brian, those cave and rock shelter paintings were actually done within a few generations. They were then used for hundreds more! In fact, a medieval French priest complained that people STILL maintained a tradition of visiting caves
for Unchristian religious traditions.
It's like the few generations who built the marvelous cathedrals with stained glass generations sill use.
but, the combination of increases carbon dioxide and bacteria
from visitors have forced closure after degradation was observed.
It's a testament to tallow's longevity and we need to save a few tubs for discovery in 10,000 years. I calculate that is the collection of a few members anywayLaughing1

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 12-15-2014, 08:41 PM
#9
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Great story, Kav! Biggrin

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 12-22-2014, 06:30 AM
#10
  • leefish
  • Pisciform Cavalry
  • The Netherlands
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Cats are the only animals that domesticated themselves Cool

Typical of cats - they saw an opportunity to get free food and shelter and took it.

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 12-23-2014, 01:28 AM
#11
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@ Kav, brotha, I swear we need to hook up and have a drink together! You always have me busting up man!

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